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Member Obituaries


Long Time Member Marty Cotler

We are sad to share notice of the passing of Marty (Martin) Cotler, longtime member of our society. Marty had headed our finance committee and was instrumental in saving our building at a time when finances were very rocky. He guided us through many crises.
 
We remember his great, dry wit, and his leveling influence. He and his spouse Barbara were part of the sturdy foundation of our Essex Group. They personified the Ethical philosophy. Barbara passed in July of 2021. 
 
Both Marty and Barbara are truly missed and remembered with much love.
 
Messages of sympathy may be directed to his daughter Valerie at 482 Ridgewood Road, Maplewood, NJ 07040
 

Leader Emerita Boe Meyerson
Has Passed Away

Obituary here


 


 

Obituary for Boe Meyerson

By her brother

 

 

How do we give homage to someone like Barbara Meyerson? To do so we must first understand where she came from and how she grew into the sophisticated intellect she became.

 

Barbara was a war baby, born in August 1943 in Fernandina Beach, Florida. Later moved to the Bronx where she started school. It was clear to her teachers, right from the start, that Barbara was someone special, always looking beyond the obvious and not taking the popular direction. Barbara was a ferocious reader; she would read everything she could get her hands on. Not just novels or the classics but subjects dealing with philosophy, art, and religious history nothing was beyond her comprehension. She earned the respect of the school staff and her peers and received numerous awards and commendations all through her school years.

 

She was a civil right activist who wasn’t afraid to march and protest both in the North and in the deep South. After receiving her Master’s degree from Berkley University, she decides to take a teaching position at an all-Black Collage in Fayetteville North Carolina. Although this was satisfying to her, there was deeper hunger for higher education and knowledge, so after several years in Fayetteville, she applied for and received a fellowship to Columbia University to seek her Doctorate. After several years and dealing with problems that were not in her control and struggling to write her thesis, she settled for a 2nd Master’s Degree.

 

Looking to use the knowledge she had gained; she left the education field and went to work for the New Jersey Department of Probation as a supervisor. Where again she was quickly recognized as a person that had a great deal to offer. She was involved with the “Scared Stright program” and was one of the founders of the “Early Release of Non-Violate offenders” where she personally supervised the offenders at all hours of the night, checking to make sure they were following the rules of there probation. She was asked to write a report on the state judges to evaluate their participation in this program.

 

Still looking for more out of life and to explore more and to use the deep-rooted humanity that she developed she Joined Ethical Culture Society. Here she was able to socialize and share with people who thought and felt the same as she did. Looking to give even more to this organization, that she was so deeply involved with, she worked to become their leader. Here is where Barbara blossomed and was able to use all her knowledge coupled with masterful command of the English language, she was finally achieving the goals she wanted out of life.

 

Even with the heavy work load that she put on herself, she still found the time for her music and personal writings. She was a gifted writer and loved to write poetry, here is an example of what she was capable of:

 

Barbara was asked to write and recite the following at one of her best friend’s funeral and it was presented on September 23, 1979.

 

It is titled!

 

 

A GIFT FOR MY FRIEND HELEN

 

BRUTAL IRONY

HER BIRTHDAY APPROACHES

 

CURES--------CURELESS

SCIENCE-----------HELPLESS

ALL THE CUNNING AND SKILL OF OUR TIME--------

                                                          NOT ENOUGH

 

ASKING THAN HOW TO CELEBRATE?

                                                WHETHER TO

                                                          WHAT TO

                                                                   DO

                                                                             SAY

                                                                                      FEEL?

 

MAYBE THEN JUST GLOSS OVER

TAKE MIDDLE GROUND

NOT SAY TOO MUCH

          NOT DO MUCH

                   NOT FEEL…….AH…..WELL

 

NO

NOT THE MIDDLE GROUND THIS TIME

NO COWARDICE

 

YOU

          YES YOU IN BLACK, WAITING OVER THERE,

                                      YES YOU………..DEATH

STAND UP!

TAKE YOUR HANDS OUT OF YOUR POCKETS

LOOK THIS WAY

THAT’S BETTER

 

NOW WATCH WHAT YOU ARE HELPLESS TO DESTROY

OUR JOY IN HER BIRTH AND HER LIFE

AND YOU CANNOT DIMINISH IT

BUT WE SHALL MAGNIFY IT BEYOND COUNTING

                                                EVEN THROUGH OUR …..OUR TEARS

 

AND

WE

SHALL

CELEBRATE

 

 

Barbara was not just an intellect; she craved and loved the outdoors. She loved mountain climbing, white water rafting and loved to explore. On visiting South America, she hacked her way through the jungle to see nature on the Amazon River, she climbed the Alps as well as the Rockies. Nothing was going to stop her from achieving the things she wanted to do in life.

 

Until she was greeted by the worst thief in the world, something that would rob her, of the most prized possession she had. Using all the intellect and knowledge she had accumulated, she fought an unwinnable war.

 

Looking back on Barbara’s life and accomplishments we can all say that she enjoyed life to the fullest and it is an honor to have been her brother.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Susan Teshu

 

 

The AEU office with sadness released a statement that Susan Teshu, Ethical Leader and former member of the Essex Society, died peacefully on Tuesday, July 11, 2023, surrounded by family.

She was beloved by many in our communities. Ethical Culture and the American Ethical Union were deeply important to her throughout her life. Susan is survived by her children, Noah and Corina. A memorial will take place at 2:00 PM on August 12th in Boston. There will be a Zoom component. More information to come. Direct any questions to office@aeu.org.

.

 

 
 

 

Memorial for Rosalie Sussman


Rosalie: Image by Florence Weisz (Florence's artwork in back)

 

Rosalie Sussman, long time member of the Ethical Culture Society of Essex County, died December 16, 2020 at the age of 88. Rosalie began her association with the Essex Ethical through the Friday evening group Health Awareness for Singles and became an active member over five decades serving on the Board and many committees. Rosalie was a talented and vivacious woman, professional seamstress and decorator, line and folk dancer, choral singer in Kol Dodi and the Solidarity Singers, and instructor of stitchery at Chautauqua Institution for a time. Rosalie was very proud of returning to college as an adult to complete her degree in Home Economics from Montclair State University. She also affirmed her Jewish identity through her promotion of the Yiddish language and culture and temple affiliation. She was pre-deceased by her son Brandon and is survived by her daughter Betsy, granddaughter Emily, and nieces and nephews.

 

 

 

Bob Bender


Bob Bender, long time member and friend of the Ethical Society of Essex County, NJ, passed away on Sunday, April 21st, 2019,  at his home in Deerfield Park Florida. 

 

Here is his obituary.

 

We remember Bob's trime here where he was a board member and office manager for many years.  He and Patty have lived their ethical life as staunch social activists, spearheading many causes in our area as well as at their current residence in Florida.  Our days were brightened whenever he and Patty paid us a visit here.  Bob had a smile and a good word for everyone.  He sang his heart out in the Ethical Chorus here, and his life was a hymn to social justice.

Our hearts reach out to his wife and our friend,  Patty, as well as to his family.

 

Patty’s address is

 

159 Keswick C.

Deerfield Park, Florida 33442

Email address--pattygbender@gmail.com    

 



E. Betty Levin, 92, of Millburn, New Jersey passed away on May 16, 2018.

A licensed psychotherapist, a long-time member of the Ethical Culture Society, and a peace educator, Betty remained politically active until her final days. At the time of her passing, Betty served on the Board of Trustees of the Ethical Society of Essex County, and maintained a part-time psychotherapy practice. A founding member of the New Jersey Association of Women Therapists, Betty's practice spanned four decades. Betty wasa longtime Ethical Culture Society member, peace educator, and psychotherapist. As a private practice psychotherapist for over 40 years, Betty evinced  a broad understanding of contemporary society and tradition-anchored humanistic values, vital for a meaningful human journey. She considered herself a “clinical philosopher.” She has been founder and past president of the N.J. Association of Women Therapists where she has been honored for her “wisdom and contributions to the creativity and development of the Association.” She is past president of ASERVIC, Association for Spirituality, Ethics and Religious Values in Counseling of the New Jersey Counseling Association.

Betty was a member of the Ethical Culture Movement almost all her adult life and a member of the Essex Society for over 50 years. During this period, she served as president, on the Board of Trustees and as a Sunday school teacher. She was also deeply involved in the Peace Movement and in the ECSEC's part in it.  She said, “My role models have taught me much. … We keep growing and learning till the end of our days. Achieving knowledge is a life-long experience, not necessarily confined to institutions of learning. The longer you live, the more opportunity to discover morsels to season, digest and absorb. Thus becoming an elder offers the possibility of triumph.”



Jerry Kaplan passed away May 8, 2013.

We mourn the death of ethical society member Jerry Kaplan, 86, who passed away on Wednesday, May 8th. His son Michael wrote that Jerry “died peacefully at the home of his significant other Flo Hauer’s, with Flo and my brother Andrew present.”
Jerry Kaplan was born in the Bronx and resided in New York. He served in the U.S. Army during and after World War II. He moved to Roselle Park, N.J., in 1960 and lived there for three years before moving to Maplewood in 1963, where he remained until December 2012, when he relocated to Ocean Township.
Jerry received his bachelor’s degree in mathematics from Cornell University and his master’s degree in English from New York University. He was a writer, editor and teacher. In the field of education, he coauthored several elementary textbook series. His other publications included short fiction and articles that appeared in Commentary, The New York Times, The Jewish News, the News-Record and various journals.
Jerry was predeceased by his wife, Thelma, in April, 1999. He is survived by his loving sons, Michael and his wife, Norene, of Metuchen, N.J.; Andrew, of Astoria, N.Y., and Bruce and his wife, Kate Robin, of Los Angeles, Calif. Jerome was the beloved grandfather of Henry and Eve Kaplan. He is also survived by his loving companion, Flo Hauer.
A member of the Essex Ethical Culture Society, Jerry presented a Platform several years ago titled, “Confessions of a Liberal.” Among his many fine qualities, Jerry will also be missed for his good cheer and kibbitzing.
We plan to hold a memorial service which will include his son’s original musical composition for Jerry. Please watch for an email announcement to come.
A short video tribute to Jerry was put together with the help of family & friends that can be viewed here..

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Fred Sebastian

 

 

 

 

Fred Sebastian was born in San Sebastian, Puerto Rico.  He lived for years in Rockland County and attended Pearl River High School.  For many years he owned an electronics store in upper Manhattan.  Additionally, he started a music and CD distribution service and moved to West Orange.  He also repaired and re-cycled computers and other electronic equipment. 
He did much volunteer work for New Jersey Peace Action and other organizations and helped with the founding of Union County Peace Council and co-sponsored UCPC documentary film showings.  www.ucpeace.org

 

Pau Surovell, Fred Sebastian, and Madelyn Hoffman of Peace Action
 He also organized lectures, concerts and film showings at the Ethical Culture Society of Essex County, where he was a member of theBoard of Trustees.
Fred, along with his book and CD table, became a regular presence at many peace and environmental festivals and local street fairs. He is survived by two sisters and his son, Jesse.

 

Donations can be made in Fred's name to New Jersey Peace Action, 673 Bloomfield Avenue, Bloomfield, NJ 07003 www.njpeaceaction.org; or to the Ethical Culture Society of Essex County www.essexethical.org, where the Fred Sebastian Film Series is being founded in his name to continue Fred's vision for enlightenment, peace and activism.

 

 

The Phil Sosis Memorial Page

Photos from Memorial Service at Ethical Culture, July 16, 2006

 

 

Alone No Longer

 

I am isolated

Surrounded

By experiences long past

Adhered to my bones

Encrusted

Imbedded deep -- Waiting

For the day when I awaken

To the spirit that will address me

As whole!

When I go among my peers

Head high, my breath deep and alive

My voice listened to

My mirror reflects my truth

I will need to hold my silence no longer!

Thank you, dear Love

For you have allowed me to grow.

You awakened me to my mortality

I cannot remember with precision

The events that sent me into hiding

Or what twisted my lips that split words

Words that fell short

I suddenly realized that I ned stammer no longer!

Thank you, my darling, for your faith in me

My love for you is eternal

I AM ALONE NO LONGER!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Member and long time friend of the society, Phil Sosis, died at 87 on June 22, 2002, in Greenfield, Massachusetts. Phil was born in New York City on September 13, 1914, and spent much of his childhood in the Hebrew Orphanage.  He was employed for 40 years by Pioneer Industries, a company that manufactured steel doors. He helped organize and was a charter member of the United Brotherhood of Carpenters and Joiners. He received a life membership for his 50 years of service.

After retiring from Pioneer, he pursued a college degree, attending Montclair State University. When he was 65, he graduated cum laude. Phil was then employed as a vocational counselor for next 12 years.

A poet through much of his life, it was his retirement at 77 that enabled him to devote more of his time to poetry. He was a patron of the Academy of American Poets. Among his published works are Compilation; A View of Old Age, The Rookery; Preludes, Probes, Dreams; and Sonata for Three Voices.

He lived his last years in Greenfield, Massachusetts. Survivors include his wife Suzanne (Kimmel) Gluck-Sosis; three sons– Richard and his wife Judith of New Rochelle, New York; Phil and Geraldeen Lohman of Wethersfield, Connecticut; Frederic and Gerette Gluck of Hyde Park, Vermont; a daughter, Louisa Gluck of Sebastopol, California; a brother, Paul Sosis of Oakland, New Jersey; a sister, Ruth Schaeffer of New York City; six grandchildren, and many nieces and nephews. Two previous wives predeceased him.

Watch this page for samples of Phil's poetry.

Please feel free to email short memories of Phil to Essex@essexethical.org for sharing here.

 

 

 

 

 

Painting by Hannah Horowitz Mastrolia

 

 

 

Resume
OBJECTIVE:
To grow old and not forget
what it means to begin.
EXPERIENCE:
Born under the domed zodiac of Virgo
I come to all experience virginal
Not in Virgo's innocence but with an
open sophisticated mind filled with
September's passion and desire.
I come dressed in psychedelic patterns
of genetic change that hold the seeds
of evolving birth and the dryrot snap
of coming death.
She has also endowed me with
an inner complex image
broadbrushed on trees-- on mountainsides--
brushes in lush greens, golds,
yellows, bronzes, reds
and finally-- rust--
crumbled -- cultivates the earth.
So do I become an artisan with experience
fleshing out my psyche-- my fingertips
are verandas to my eye, my touch, my skin
in passion touch and senses touch and image
touch and ego touch
filling in the niches and crannies
echoing and rejecting the inane rattling
claptrap-- and then there are
the red pleasures and orange pleasures and
green pleasures
and jazzybluey blues filling
this september child
with countless numbers gone by,
with pliable hardness
in all their ups and downs.
Sometimes my abrasions show
building mystery
mixed with aging adolescence--
My wrinkled skin witness to this
between the fire and the ice--I dream
in wonderment and awe
knowing my failures
my strengths and the knockdowns
that someday I won't spring up from--
I'm the total made up from
these parts and pieces
for now--my inner horizon spreads to
encompass new shades of old colors.
This then my symphony mixed
with classical jazz.
References supplied upon request.
        From The Rookery, (Rocky Hill, CT: The Canopus Press, 1995)
 

 

Phil in 2002

 

 

 

ARTICLE ON GRIEVING
(First published in Winter issue of The People's Voice)
By Suzanne Gluck-Sosis

 

How does one mourn the death of one’s soul mate?? How does one express the grief experienced at the loss of one’s mentor, friend, lover, teammate, partner, husband? In many contradictory ways, in my experience. And from knowledge of others’, in innumerable singular journeys.

I cannot speak of grieving without first saying that at the moment of Phil’s death at Franklin Medical Center, Room 120, at 5:30 P.M on Saturday, June 22,2002 I felt sad, relieved, and peaceful. Relieved that he was no longer in the pain he had experienced in that last week; sad that he had had a seizure or convulsion a few minutes before death, biting his tongue till it bled; and peaceful once that had passed. He had opened his eyes and looked at Frederic, his stepson who had arived just half hour before with his wife and 2 young children. He then looked at me and closed his eyes again for the last time.

Frederic said later "Phil was present when he looked at me – he seemed to be emitting love in his gaze." And later, upon thinking about the tongue-biting, he speculated that Phil had been trying to say something to us but his stuttering prevented him from uttering words. Gerette stayed with me as I said a last goodbye by embracing him wholly and washing his body. She took some photos for Louisa, who had not been able to come in from California in time. Then we covered Phil whose face was now frown-free, calm, and peaceful as if he were napping. We left his physical being to be bundled off to the Smith-Kelleher Funeral Home. Two days later it would be sent to Springfield to be cremated. That was good –for it would give his soul, the essence of his energy, time to depart from his body.

Frederic and Sonya, almost seven, and Luke, two, left the hospital before Gerette and I – on the steps of the hospital, Frederic commented that it was too bad that Phil had not been able to go up to Poet’s Seat Tower because of his Parkinson’s Disease. Sonya piped up, "Now he can!" They drove up to the Tower and climbed to the top. Frederic, holding up his arms to the sky, and turning to the four directions, intoned, "Long live Phil Sosis!" When he completed the fourth direction, a huge tree fell down in the forest in front of them. It seemed so logical! Phil was such a special person and had affected so many people in their soul.

We had loved each other so deeply and thoroughly – we had both wanted him to live as long as he possibly could, and he did live longer than anyone had expected. I was so determined to help him to stay alive, to serve him as lovingly as I was able. He had such a lust for life and people and poetry. He kept saying, "I’m not ready to die yet, I still have more poems to write!" And he was not afraid to die. Here is how he expressed it in one of his poems:

Connections
In the fall of my years
I feel spiraling Winter and wonder
How warm/cold/friendly
Or anti will Death be-
Will it cradle me
Or rock me hard?
Either way – expanding
I look forward to my ABCs
In the seminar on afterlife
Preparing me (for or if) I return
Until that happens, know this:
I deplore pain
Pray for serenity
Will continue on to the very last exit
To struggle for Peace/Equality/Freedom
I shall not go quietly
But shout my last haloo.

 

Such was Phil’s attitude throughout his long illness. Yes, I felt sad and also buoyed up by the spirit of his soul/his energy. Frederic, Gerette, Sonya, and Luke stayed with me until the Celebration of Phil’s life the following Saturday at All Souls Church. Family and friends converged on Greenfield from Connecticut, New York, New Jersey,Maryland, California, Vermont. Each member of the family wished to speak, myself, his son Richard, his stepson Phil, his grandchildren Melissa, Karin, Andrew, Leah, his stepchildren, Louisa and Frederic, his brother Paul.

The service began with Paul Robeson singing Kaddish and ended with Paul Robeson singing a freedom song from the Polish Warsaw ghetto. It was beautiful. I was numb, functioning automatically in the ‘hostess role". During the reception that followed, I stood in one spot for hours while people approached with their condolences and hugs. I wanted to be sure they felt they were acknowledged and heard. It is astounding how I sailed through it and being with the extended family later at our house and on into the night.

Mercifully, it seems that our bodies and mind and heart are protected for this period of time so that we can refrain from wailing and sobbing and falling apart. I began that phase of the bereavement process during the third month after Phil’s death. Every day brought with it a period of crying or wailing – of just wanting to be held, and rocked, and soothed, and taken care of. Not being able to take care of Phil’s needs, physical, emotional, social left me feeling bereft. What was I to do now? Such a big, empty space confronted me. I needed time to just be – to wait to learn what was in store for me to do. I knew that if I were patient, a new path would be revealed to me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Memorial Service for Phil Sosis at Essex Ethical on July 16, 2006

There was a beautiful memorial service for Phil Gluck-Sosis
at the Society and in the Memorial Garden on Sunday, July 16. To learn more about Phil and read some of his poetry, click here. Here are some photos, courtesy of Phil's stepson Phil Lohman. People include Suzanne Gluck-Sosis, Louisa Gluck, Sonia Gluck, RIchard Sosis, Paul Sosis, Phil Lohman, and the whole clan:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Information for Members of the The Ethical Culture
Society of Essex County

Home

 

Members Coffee Schedule 2013-14 

 

Jerry Kaplan passed away May 8, 2013.
Click here for a video tribute from his family.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

We are Not Alone! Other Ethical Societies Around the Country

 

American Ethical Union

Washington Ethical Society

Baltimore Ethical Society

The Ethical Society of St. Louis

The Ethical Society of Austin

Ethical Humanist Society of Philadelphia

Ethical Society of Boston

South Place Ethical Society

Ethical Humanist Society of Long Island

Ethical Humanist Society of the Triangle

Ethical Society Mid Rivers

Ethical Society Without Walls

New York Society for Ethical Culture

Ethical Culture Society of Westchester

Ethical Society of Northern West Chester

The Ethical Culture Society of Essex County

Ethical Society of Asheville

Ethical Humanist Society of Chicago

Ethical Culture Society of Puget Sound

Brooklyn Society for Ethical Culture

The Ethical Culture Society of Bergen County, New Jersey

Riverdale Yonkers Society for Ethical Culture

Ethical Culture Society of Silicon Valley

 

 

Members: Your 2012- 2013
Coffee Calendar
Letter & Instructions

 

 

 

 

News about Friends

 

From Bob Bender, 2-6-13

 

I've been running on all pistons -until this past Sunday- with four at least somewhat overlapping groups. WAR VS HUMAN NEEDS- Continues steadily along. We haven't been able to emulate the pace from our start as Rethink Afghanistan - showing the film with a speaker 28 times in 18 months from 2009-10, contributing to the delegitimization of the War policy. We've continued our education programs and lobbying. Last year we became an Organizational Member of Peace Action; last month we hosted Peace Action Field Coordinator Judith Le Blanc for 5 days, centered around the Sunday, January 13 "What Would MLK Do - and What Will YOU do - in 2013?" at UUCFL where she delivered the sermon , "MLK on Peace, Militarism,

Internationalism" and made another presentation at the afternoon segment led by Occupy Ft Lauderdale Labor Outreach. . Was good to sponsor her at a Friday program with Citizens for Social Responsibility and was honored to have a financial contribution and to inherit collection baskets from the group. She also spoke at a film on Liberian women's peace movement on Saturday night and at a double program at FAU on Monday afternoon, as well as a Thursday evening session with WvHN. OCCUPY FT LAUDERDALE LABOR OUTREACH- Likewise. In addition to support for OUR WALMART and other related efforts, , we're proud to have contributed toward the enactment of a Broward Wage Theft/Recovery ordinance in November and are working with a group organizing low-income employees at Fort Lauderdale Airport -trying to bring them into the existing Broward Living Wage ordinance.

Will see soon if we have the energy for a May Day program; last year's was inspiring. UNITARIAN UNIVERSALIST CHURCH OF FT LAUDERDALE (UUCFL): Patty and I sing in the choir and are active in social justice work, which overlaps with the three other groups mentioned here. UUCFL is blessed with a socially conscious, activist-appreciating minister who paves the way for social justice works, sometimes initiating, and has welcomed OCCUPY groups to meet there. NEW JIM CROW: MASS INCARCERATION IN THE AGE OF COLOR BLINDNESS: With UUCFL as the base for meeting and the minister and a few other congregants participating among the twenty at the initial of the 6 sessions, we have a promising Read/Discuss/Act group. I strongly recommend reading the dynamite book by Michelle Alexander. Wish all this personal activity reflected a Mass Movement!!!

Patty and I went Northeast on January 25 -spent a good weekend in Springfield, MA at the Peoples Music Network/Songs for Freedom and Struggle, then a week with NJ family and friends. Then I traveled to DC for 3 days with Peace Action. But Reversal struck. Upon my arrival in DC,the bitter Northeast cold provoked a sinus attack - from which I'd been free since avoiding frigid temperatures. Never know how long these and their aftermath last. So I immediately returned to warm Florida.

While in NJ I re-read Margaret Nowak's book on her and Stanley's history and reached out by email to Linda Marinowitz, since her parents and grandfather's lives were so enveloped with the Novaks. Got the usual warm response. In addition to being involved with me on all of the above, Patty is also the president of the CVE Camera Club, is a board member of the Deerfield Progressive Forum and our Condo Association and keeps busy as well with her good pottery.

She'll be spending a month back in NJ grandmothering from mid-March to mid-April while our daughter in law is off on a Fulbright-supported visit to Viet Nam. Our grandsons are thriving in all ways, including musically. Nat 's employer the American Federation of Teachers of NJ sent him to Ohio and he saved the election there for Obama. Dan and Kelly are also dong well.

 

 

 

 

 

In December, 2011, Joel Weinberger and his wife Sarah visited Mike and Marie Siegel in Santa Rosa, California. He says, "They seem to be doing very well, and it was wonderful to see them....They've converted their entire backyard into a large garden, including 75 strawberry plants, around 8 fruit tress, and 2 chickens." They spent most of Friday night and Saturday afternoon just chatting with them and catching up, although Saturday morning they visited the Charles Schulz museum

 

 

 

 

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Members who would welcome get-well cards:

 
Cardsare appreciated for Seymour Armstrong:
Seymour & Freda Armstrong
37 Annette Drive
Edison, NJ 08820
 

Addresses:

 

Bob and Patty Bender
159 Keswick C
Deerfield Beach, FL 33442
Cell phones:
908-477-7811 for Patty
908-477-7812 for Bob
 

Condolences

 

Long time friend Gerald Stillman, husband of member Mira Stillman passed away on October 28, 2011. Mira's address is 53 Durand Road, Maplewood, NJ 07040.

 

Long-time member Fran Relkin passed away 12-25-10
Send condolences to Dennis at denstar51@mail.com

Honorary Lifetime member Ted Seagull's daughter
Sara Seagull
107 West 28 St. #3
New York, NY 10001
Sara's email:  saraline@rcn.com

Memories of Ted Seagull

by Betty Levin

 

Ted was a humorous, kind, loving and very intelligent person, an accomplished wordsmith, known for his love of books and extraordinary ability to do crossword puzzles, even the Sunday NY Times!

We met right here at our own Ethical Culture Society at a party commemorating the time Joe Lebrecht established our Essex Society. It was suggested we dress up in the fashions of the period (c. 1915), which appealed to my daughter, Wendy. She encouraged me to attend, and what a beneficent happenstance! Ted was recovering from hip surgery necessitated by a serious fall from a circus bicycle. He was pale, wan and clearly in pain when I encountered him leaning on both our podium and his cane. But his depth and articulateness showed through and I was smitten, interested in getting to know him better. I obtained his phone number from Suzanne Gluck who I knew had influenced him in attending that evening (“He was depressed and needed to get out of his apartment”). He seemed delighted by my call and said he planned to do the same. We started dating regularly, spent Thanksgiving weekend in the Poconos and progressed from there, having a “weekend marriage”, getting together at my house every Wednesday and weekends, celebrating October 1 as our anniversary, the date we met at Ethical.

Ted attended Platforms and other activities at Ethical with me quite regularly. Suddenly, he announced to me one day that he wanted to join as a member. I had never inquired or discussed his relationship to the Society; certainly never pressured him. But what a member he became, thoroughly committed. Soon, he became the newsletter editor and eventually an adjunct leader for marital services, conducting numerous weddings through the years, bringing substantial funds to our treasury. One particular couple became members after their marriage, Mahasin and Jim Pomarico who attended Ted’s memorial service. Mahasin became a Sunday school teacher and Jim a board member.

Ted was a devoted participant in Dr. Calvin Chatlos’s Human Faith Group and through that learning was able to forge a warm and enduring relationship with his loving daughter, Judy. Most poignant was Ted’s officiating at Judy’s marriage to her beloved Pete.

Ted’s passion for his three daughters, Sara, Debby and Judy, was formidable. Rarely was Ted more joyful than when he had one of his delightful telephone calls with Sara, the pleasure vibrating against the walls. Sara became the most deeply devoted and involved in his care during his final illness, often calling me to report his condition after Ted and I had parted. Another of his highly joyful experiences was driving up to New Paltz to visit Debby. His frequent visits to Judy and Pete’s home sustained his loving relationship. He loved to regale me with stories of how much his daughters loved the Sunday morning pancakes he made for them, with their exuberant cries of appreciation, “Daddy, we love you so much!”

Another deep love of Ted’s was for his younger brother, Arthur, of Okemos, Michigan, who drove here with his wife Betty to conduct the traditional grave side burial service. Not only is Arthur well versed in Jewish religion but is also a practicing psychologist, a gourmet cook and an accomplished ballroom dancer. He and Betty have written and published a book on the art of ballroom dancing. I remember Ted and I traveling to Okemos for their son Jonathan’s Bar Mitzvah. Arthur made 20 elegant desserts for the occasion. Arthur is the last surviving brother in the family.

Ted’s three grandsons (Judy’s children) traveled from various parts of the country to attend the services. A warm reception was held at the Ethical Society after the grave side service, with 50 people in attendance.

Ted cherished his Jewish roots. He was one of the founders of Temple Beth Ahn, a conservative synagogue in Springfield. When they first struggled to organize and met in the basement of a local church, it was Ted who conducted the services. When the synagogue was firmly established with Rabbi Reuben Levine at the helm, we became friends with him and his wife Shirley, sharing interests in art and gardening. Reuben attended Sunday platforms at Ethical on several occasions, perhaps connecting to humanist ideas enriching his own sermons.

Ted and I enjoyed much culture, music, ballet, theater and took fine vacations together — Hawaii, the Smokies, Elderhostel trips and the pinnacle, our multitudinous trips to the Berkshires, especially Chanterwood in S. Lee, an enchanting cabin colony on a pristine lake deep in the woods where we swam in the bracing sparkling water, even before breakfast. (The photo is Ted emerging from one of those rapturous swims.) Sadly, Chanterwood no longer exists but memories linger.

Ted had some unfortunate life experiences which sometimes marred the quality of his life. One dramatic experience occurred in kindergarten. Ted loved books and his devoted mother often read to him, sitting on the floor with Ted facing her. His astuteness enabled him to follow the words, reading them upside down. When the kindergarten teacher asked if anyone could read, Ted proudly raised his hand. He turned the book around to read as he had learned with his mother. The teacher insisted Ted was wrong, not realizing she had an extraordinary child in her class: an early reader, if a bit idiosyncratic. Ted was humiliated in a situation where he had every right to feel proud. In later life, a deeply discouraging experience impacted his professional life. Ted had served in WWII as an interpreter, fluent in French. Later, at a counseling session, Ted expressed his wish to become a doctor and it was quashed with an anti-Semitic remark. An older brother suggested Ted could become a pharmacist, also a healing profession, as he was himself. And so his chosen profession appeared. In those days, pharmacists mixed their own prescriptions rather than picking them off the shelf. I remember his sharing memories with Tony Mastrolia (husband of Hannah), also trained in that “old school.” Another memory, this one endearing: in later years, Tony developed severe dementia and Ted often took Tony to a favorite Italian restaurant for dinner and to relieve Hannah of the stress of being a caregiver and allowing her some free time to do her accomplished painting.

In a poignant moment in the early part of his illness, when he was lucid, Ted declared to me, “I have had 2 marriages.” When I telephoned Ted at his nursing home on his 87th birthday, he didn’t seem to know who I was. At my final visit to him, he was having a bad day, again not knowing me. It was very sad to see him in this condition, totally void of any quality of life, a man formerly so vital and intelligent. Only modern medicine kept him alive. I felt if I received a call that he had passed on, I would experience more relief than grief.

A warming moment was when I removed an incidental book from his well-supplied bookshelf which I could read to him.  It was a journal I had given him some 30 years ago in which he had recorded details of our numerous trips together, his daughter Sara to be the eventual beneficiary of this memento.

We wish peace to Ted, in a place where all crossword puzzles are successfully completed — a place with humor and kindness abounding.
 

— E. Betty Levin

 

 

 

 

December 2011: Piece by Paul Surovell on the Iraq War

 

 

Maplewood, South Orange and the Iraq War

by Paul Surovell

“I’m voting yes, because if every town in America passes a resolution like this, there will be no war in Iraq.”  After Maplewood Township Committee member David Huemer spoke those words, the TC passed a resolution against going to war in Iraq in a dramatic 3-2 vote.  The debate had lasted more than two hours in a packed Town Hall.  It was February 18, 2003, one month before the US invasion.

The antiwar resolution, initiated by South Mountain Peace Action, was introduced and managed by Mayor Vic De Luca.

I would like to take David Huemer’s words one step further: if every town in America had seen the same level of protest as Maplewood and South Orange, the war in Iraq would have ended years before its 9-year conclusion last week. Both before and during the war in Iraq, thousands of citizens of Maplewood and South Orange spoke for peace by signing petitions, attending rallies, marches, vigils and meetings, doing sidewalk tabling and lobbying their representatives.

Throughout the war years, the Maplewood and South Orange governing bodies issued proclamations supporting local efforts for peace, as well as calling for an end to the war.  In October 2005, in an impressive show of unity, all members of the Maplewood TC, the South Orange BOT, the Columbia High School Student Council executive committee and 18 of 20 members of the Seton Hall Student Government Association signed a joint letter to Senators Corzine and Lautenberg, calling for a withdrawal plan from Iraq.

 In July 2007, Maplewood Mayor Fred Profeta and Township Committee member Vic De Luca, took part in the Cities for Peace Day in Washington DC, as part of a local delegation that also included Iraq War veteran Dan Black of South Orange.  Maplewood and South Orange were two of about 300 US cities and towns that had been designated “Cities for Peace” for passing antiwar resolutions.

Perhaps the most visible statements for peace were the thousands of “Be About Peace” signs displayed on lawns and cars in Maplewood and South Orange.

The slogan “Be About Peace” was coined by 10-year-old Tuscan student Jackson Roberts and printed on signs that his family distributed at the Maplewood Train Station on February 15, 2003, to Maplewoodians going to the massive peace demonstration in New York.

 In 2005, South Mountain Peace Action organized the first annual “Be About Peace Day:” an afternoon of arts and crafts for kids with a theme of peace, followed by an evening with speakers and discussion.  Both Maplewood and South Orange have officially proclaimed “Be About Peace Days” in their towns.

 The war in Iraq was a great tragedy for the American people, most notably  the families of tens of thousands of US soldiers killed or wounded, as well as the hundreds of thousands of Iraqis killed, wounded and displaced.  The direct cost of $807 billion and the overall cost of $4 trillion estimated by Nobel Prize winning economist Joseph Stiglitz, will deprive our nation of valuable economic resources for years to come.

South Orange lost two beloved residents in Iraq, Marine Lance Corporal Augie Schroeder on August 3, 2005, and Army Major Dwayne Kelley on June 24, 2008.  Families of both men participated in ceremonies to install memorial plaques in the Peace Garden behind the Ethical Culture Society building at 516 Prospect Street.  The plaques can still be viewed there.

Augie Schroeder’s parents, Rosemary Palmer and Paul Schroeder spoke at a meeting for peace at St. George’s Church in February 2006 and subsequently formed a group for military families called Families of the Fallen for Change, which co-authored a peace petition with South Mountain Peace Action in 2007.

 As the Iraq war draws to an end I am moved to reflect on these and many more actions taken in our communities on behalf of peace to prevent and then to end, a tragic, unnecessary war based on falsehoods and fear.

The most important lesson, in my view, is to learn from this experience going forward. Let us hope we continue to find the courage and patriotism to speak out against fear and falsehoods and the unnecessary use of military force.  The message "Be About Peace," which continues to appear in our communities, remains as valid today as it did in 2003.

For a more complete and detailed record of actions taken for peace in Maplewood and South Orange, go to South Mountain Peace Actions website, www.BeAboutPeace.com.

 

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Paul Surovell is chairman of South Mountain Peace Action. He has lived in Maplewood for 34 years.

 

 

Video Clip of Singing from Boe's honoring event!

 

 

 

From Barry and Joanne

 

Green Enterprises Web Design
www.EarthcareWeb.com
646.327.5566

 

 

We arrived here on Saturday, September 12, after 3 exhaustive weeks of packing, worrying, and ultimately a mostly pleasant 1,200 mile drive.

I'm happy to report that except for heavy gecko traffic on the series of bikeways that dot our new community, life is relatively worry-free, although not necessarily for the geckos. The house we are renting has its own pool, an idea that I originally poo-pooed when first offered the choice of with or without. It didn't take much to convince me that having this little baby only steps from our living room doesn't really suck. In fact, after an arduous session of unpacking the myriad of cartons we spent those weeks filling with years of accumulated crap, and some possessions we can actually use, there is nothing like a quick dip. And my environmental friends will be pleased to learn that the pool is heated by our good friend Sol.

I know it is too soon to make predictions, but right now, Sarasota is looking really good as a permanent location for Joanne, me, and our 3 furry charges. The 90 degree heat that still lingers from the hot summer is not much of a deterrent since the alleged Supreme Being invented air-conditioning and swimming pools.

But before I go back for my next dip, let me give you our new contact information:

5712 Ferrara Drive
Sarasota, FL 34238
Home phone: 941-552-6526 (or 941-5-jam-jam)
Barry's cell stays the same: 646-327-5566

 

 

Snapshots of Events and New Members

 

 

 

 

Statement on Religious Identity
of Ethical Culture Fall 2008

(In order to read this, you need Adobe Acrobat Reader, which
can be downloaded for free if you click here.)

 

Here is a copy of the Society's Current By-Laws.
(In order to read this, you need
Adobe Acrobat Reader, which can be downloaded
free if you click here.)

Special Contact Information for Members and Friends

 

Notes On Members and Friends' Activities

 

Fall 2008:

See clip of Patty and Bob Bender on CBS T.V.

 

July 2008 Notes:

Intercepted emails with updates on the Benders and Mike and Marie!

 

June 2008:

Carol Varker passed away in June 2008.
Please join in condolences to her husband Dick.
You may write him a t18 Karam Circle, West Orange, NJ 07052

See Terri Suess's letter-to-the editor of the Star-Ledger
about the National Guard here or on the Social Action Page.

 

Past:

Molly Gilman being interveiwed on television!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d28QgCBU9UY

Snapshots of the Appalachian Coal Miner's Dinner at Sue & Andy's. If you liked the "Songs of Coal," the book and cd
are available from a wonderful Appalachian group at this site.
 

 

 

 

E-mail, Address & Phone updates

 

Terri Suess
tsuess05@yahoo.com

Obrzut, Tom & Rebekah Novemsky
bektom@comcast.net
Jerry Kaplan
973-763-1921
Bob and Patty Bender
159 Keswick C
Deerfield Beach, FL 33442
Cell phones:
908-477-7811 for Patty
908-477-7812 for Bob
Louisa Lubiak
1106 EVERGREEN ROAD
YARDLEY, PA  19067
215-428-1429
Marie Weber and Mike Siegel
mrsiegel@sonic.net and
marievweber@yahoo.com .

 

 

 

Bob Bender reports: Larry Lorre,  of South Orange, who in the 1960s was active with the Ethical Youth/Young Adult group and in the chorus in the 90s, died October 17, 2006.  Larry retired from the NJ/Essex County  Probation Dept several years ago.  He had been active in the civil rights movement in the 1960s. He had lived with former ECS member Carrie Schwimmer. There's a gathering for Larry on Thursday, October 19, 7 - 9 p.m. at the Preston Funeral Home on South Orange Avenue at Prospect Street, South Orange.

 

 

 

 

Janet Mangano has been coming to the Essex Ethical Society for more than thirteen years to grace us with pre-platform music. She has participated in the Chamber Music Study Program at the Society directed by Joseph Gluck and Mary Babiarz and in the Diller-Quaile Amateur Chamber Music Program in New York City.  
In the past, she has performed as a soloist, accompanist, and ensemble member in Philadelphia, New York City, Krakow (Poland), and Vienna (Waehring District).
Janet studied at Philadelphia Musical Academy (now The University of the Arts) with Clement Petrillo, teacher of Andre Watts, and at Settlement Music School with Hal Friedman. She is a graduate of the University of Pennsylvania and Columbia University. Always interested in ethnic musical roots and derivatives, she played prima balalaika with the Penn Balalaika Orchestra, and studied sitar with Dr. Lalmani Mishra at the University of Pennsylvania.
Currently residing in Short Hills with her husband Charlie and twin sons Andrew and Mark, she specializes in the music of Albeniz, Bach, Bartok, Mozart, and Schubert.
The Society is most grateful for Janet's contribution with her fine technique and musicianship, she enhances and elevates our Sundays together.

On December 19, 2004 the Ethical Culture Society of Essex County adoped the following statement:
Whereas extensive irregularities concerning the November 2, 2004 elections have been widely reported around the country; and whereas, these irregularities severely shake our faith in the fairness of our voting processes while undermining the legitimacy of our entire democracy; and whereas, the Ethical Culture Society of Essex County that has made Maplewood, New Jersey, its home for more than 50 years, holds the principles of a free and open democratic society among its highest values; therefore be it resolved, that we urge our elected representatives at the state and federal levels to conduct public hearings to examine the practices of recording, tabulating and reporting election results so as to assure as best as is humanly possible that those who represent us are doing so under the fairest practices.
 
Dear Friends,

As we move into 2008, I send you wishes for a wonderful and peace-filled year.  I also want to tell you about, or remind you about the Ethical Culture Society I am a part of.

The Ethical Society Without Walls is a place where people can connect to explore living more ethical lives. We'd like to connect with more people who want to be part of an Ethical Culture community where they can connect with others who have similar lifestances. Please visit the Ethical Society Without Walls and invite others to visit also.

I believe so strongly that Ethical Culture offers a path and a place to strengthen our abilities to live more ethically, to have more satisfying relationships as we strive for right relationships, and to encourage us to make the world a better place for everyone. We support each other through difficult times and celebrate life's joys together. We learn and explore together.

Even if you know that an Ethical Culture society isn't right for you, would you take a moment to ask yourself "Who do I know that might be interested in knowing about the Ethical Society Without Walls?" I would so appreciate your forwarding this email to anyone you know who might want to explore our society and see if it is right for them.

Some of what they'll be able to do at ESWoW:

  • participate in the ESWoW Community
  • learn about Ethical Culture
  • read and listen to Platforms and blogs about ethical living
  • share and explore ideas on our forums
  • take action on important ethical issues

As of January 1, 2008, I'll be the sole Leader of ESWoW. As the founding Co-Leaders of ESWoW Randy Best and I share a vision of creating a place where people could learn about Ethical Culture and explore putting it into practice in their lives. Randy is moving to a new position as Leader of the North Carolina Society for Ethical Culture and I'll be continuing to work with ESWoW.

I'm committed to maintaining, and even increasing the vision and the vitality we've developed. I want to welcome more and more people to ESWoW. This is a wonderful opportunity for people to participate with others in learning, discussing and acting to have more ethical lives.

So, who do you know who might be interested in knowing about our Ethical Society? Do you know someone interested in exploring ideas about how to live their lives well, and might like to connect with others in that exploration?

I appreciate your taking a moment to visit ESWoW, and/or forward this email to others who might be interested in knowing about ESWoW, perhaps with a note to them telling them why you think they may be interested.

As we travel on our various paths to creating a more just and ethical world,

I wish you joy, peace and connection,

 

 

Peace,
Susan
--
Susan Rose
Leader, Ethical Society Without Walls
Connecting to Live More Ethical Lives
susan.rose@eswow.org
www.eswow.org

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

For more informaton, call 973-7631905
The Ethical Culture Society of Essex County
516 Prospect Street, Maplewood, NJ 07040
EMail:essex@essexethical.org
Special Thanks to our friends at Tech-9 Multimedia

 

 

 

Special Thanks to our friends at Tech-9 Multimedia

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